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  • Writer's pictureMike Douglas

Deciding to get help - My Struggle with Depression

This is another one of those be brave a do it posts. I did feel good after the last post and relieved at the responses I received publicly and privately. So here goes, with another post about my recent troubles and I guess what could be a relaps or even the continuation of something.

Thanks for reading.

I'm currently considering going to my GP to talk about depression. Let me say that most of the time I am fine. Maybe 90% of the time, I'm good.

But then I have these moments where my emotions take over. I feel confused, empty, lost and just, well, very sad. This feeling sometimes lasts 10 minutes, sometimes it's most of a day.

I feel like I must have some control over this because for the most part I feel good and we all have some down times. So is what I'm feeling really any different?

I suppose my consideration of seeking support comes from an understanding that this is not 'normal' or 'usual'. That by talking to someone else I am able to find out why I have become like this, and how I could change.

I do feel the need to say, I am happy to, and enjoy showing / experiencing emotion. I've always been a cryer when it comes to sad films (sometimes even adverts!). That feeling of emotion, even sadness, there is some element of pleasure in experiencing that emotion.

These feelings on the other hand are very different. Being overcome and ending up on the floor in the shower crying for seemingly no reason is not enjoyable. The places your mind can go, the places it can take you, they are not always good.

I'm glad I've taken the time to sit and write. I feel better having just written this. That being said I think talking to someone with professional knowledge maybe beneficial. I am going to look into this later today (I did it, I booked an appointment with my GP at the end of the day).

Again just writing this has been really beneficial for me, and hopefully, maybe, it has even helped one other person somewhere to think about their mental health and to possibly come forward and seek help.

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