Maybe more...

This week I realised, there’s more going on. There's trauma still at work.

My lived experience, like all of us, impacts what I do/ think, how I do/ think and why. This week we've had time and headspace to talk about some of that, and I noticed something I wanted to reflect on.

Laura and I both have our own experiences with mental ill health, with triggers that evoke a reaction in us. And we have our own (usually) helpful and (occasionally) non helpful ways of managing that. Something we’ve both always been focused on is language. We use positive, friendly, accurate words and phrases. For both of us this is highly impacted by our individual mental health experiences and individual neurodiversities. This is how we communicate; about things we are experiencing, about work issues, about parenting choices, about relationships, and everyday life.

The way we choose to parent and interact with each other (not just when Henry’s there), is with kindness, consideration and compassion. We don’t expect, need or desire everyone to do or communicate the same way as us, or to consider the same things kind, considerate and compassionate. But how they communicate does impact how and when we interact with them. This might be to protect Henry and our parenting choices, but it’s also happened on occasion to protect ourselves from difficult and or unpleasant situations.

I mention parenting and little Henry, because those have been the recent prompts for my reflection. Learning to be kind to yourself is hard. It’s something I’ve always been pretty rubbish at. However, becoming a parent, and learning more about Laura’s neurodivergence, has meant I prioritise my wellbeing to be able to be there for Henry and Laura all of the time. Environments and situations that have a negative impact are things I manage more overtly and effectively than before, to ensure I am well and able to take on what Laura and Henry need.

It is that mindset that has lead to the realisation that the last two months have been very difficult. We’ve both had work stresses, we are mid moving house and there’s been a few very tricky days. That realisation that, yes I can carry on at the moment, but I need to put a bit more support in and look at how I continue to manage longer term; as the needs of our family change.

It is also a nice reminder of how well and effective my usual coping strategies work. So kind of a well done to me, I guess? Running each week, listening to podcasts, having 'get up and move' breaks in the day, not spending too long without background noise, and (when I can) going for a walk, all really make a difference to my general wellbeing.

However, to bookend this thought exercise. I am increasingly coming to the realisation that, while those are all great strategies (for me), there is maybe still more mental work to be done. Being kind to myself, and realistic, I think this is something I want to prioitise in 2026. It might sound wild, and unwise, but I want to just keep going a little longer to get some of the current commitments and tasks completed to clear some headspace for this next mental exercise.

I think 2026 will involve more mental reflections and professional support. For now, I want to finish somethings started and clear that headspace for the new year.

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Blogger's note: This post does not include sponsored content. None of the services, projects, campaigns or charities mentioned have seen this post before it is published, nor have they instructed me on what to say. The views, experiences, thoughts and insights expressed in this post are my own. The links included are direct web links and are not affiliate links.

Additional links and signposting:

• Samaritans - Listening service

• Anxiety UK - Anxiety and Stress 

• Local Minds - Find your local Mind (mental health service) 

• Mental Health UK - Burnout 

• Mind - Self Care for depression

• Mind - Parent Mental Health

• Mental Health Foundation - Parenting and Mental Health 

• NHS - Low Mood: Tips for support